overcast
by Aiko Isari
Summary: Cirrus is struggling. Selina can't help with that.


_My entry for the PMD field zine!_

* * *

The geodude in front fell with a yelp, gravel falling from its mouth as it hit the wall behind it. Selina waved her tail at it, silver fur returning to its familiar cream and brown, and continued down the path. Cirrus kept ahead, lips tight, one fang buried in his bottom lip. Selina watched him but said nothing about it, instead focusing on tightening the soft green bow at her neck.

Cirrus kept at his stride, not looking back. As if he could look back and falter. Which was… likely. Her partner still shook at the sound of ordinary thunder after all. A luxio coming out from behind a stone wall could cause him to jump right out of the dungeon. Somehow. She wasn't entirely sure if that would be an improvement or a possible spiral into apathy and other negative feelings.

She caught up to him, slinking past without a touch. He blinked. "Seli?"

"We're close to the stairs," she said to him, flicking her tail once more. "Let's hurry and find that Eyedrop Seed."

His yellow eyes bore into her back as if waiting for her to turn around and shout at him, to bare her fangs and bite into his neck like she often threatened of starstruck new recruits who just didn't really understand her.

Being a human was cool after all, don't let anyone forget it. Even he'd fallen for that.

Of course, she didn't do anything of the sort, and he cursed himself for thinking he would. Selina was always kind to him. Of few words and more of action, but kind nevertheless. Nothing like home, nothing like here.

If only this place was a little more welcoming. It had been, for a while, but… Something had to give and he had been it.

"We can go back if you want."

Selina, now standing by the stairs, sounded tired. She sounded more than tired, she sounded like she hadn't been sleeping, again. A lump rose in his throat because he should have known that, should have caught on because they slept in the same room but-

"Sorry," he mumbled, paws itching to scratch at a stone.

Selina tilted her head to look at him. "Don't be sorry. You're in pain."

Cirrus couldn't help the croaking laugh that came from his mouth. "I'm fine!"

She looked at him with that doubtful, if you say so, way that she used to work wonders on everyone, including the all too happy Bidoof. Then she took a step up the path and she was gone.

Cirrus swallowed. Right. That had been a load of ponyta dung. So much for that.

He dipped his head and went to the stairs.

* * *

The problem with having no memories at all was that you didn't remember people again. You could pick up things, you could mirror people but ultimately it was just a reflection and not yourself. And making you your own a second time was simply a difficult matter. So, you didn't remember how people worked, or how they mattered or what they thought.

Selina… doesn't remember these things, so she cannot relate to the ways Cirrus quite frankly needs her to.

So, she tells the truths she sees and pays for it and it… It must hurt people. Reality hurts people because they live in it and the world doesn't follow expectations.

Hence why he had left here, full of dreams and fears. He had hoped never to come back.

Yet they just kept coming back. The missions were random, sure, no one knew he was an exile from his home, but each one felt like a stab to his paws. He rubbed his eyes.

 _Maybe if I had evolved, things would be different._

Selina brushed past him and he froze for a moment. Then he smiled to himself.

'But I wouldn't have met her. Or gone into the guild, or explored the Foggy Forest, or any of those things.'

He stepped after her and released a spark from his fur. It burst out, running along the current that wrapped Amp Plains in a shroud. The spark knocked a nearby girafarig to the ground. Selina leaped and bit down on its neck until it went still, quick and efficient.

"Good shot," she said softly, sidling back over to him. "You, all right?"

Cirrus managed a shaky smile, and watched her stand, perfectly poised. "I'm great," he said. "Thanks. Let's find that item."

Selina looked him over and dipped her head. "Yes, we don't want to miss dinner."

Cirrus smiled at her and he meant it. "Yeah."


End file.
